Small Group Life Blog

April 7, 2009

Hi [FIRSTNAME],

Question #2 in our weekly Life Transformation Group is:

What’s weighing heavy on your conscience? Or what character issue is God calling you to work on?

In the previous two Small Group Life blogs, I gave the Bible passages in support of asking and answering this question, and then the benefits. Today, we’ll talk about what it is we confess and to whom we confess.

If anyone cleanses himself from what is dishonorable, he will be a vessel for honorable use, set apart as holy, useful to the master of the house, ready for every good work. (2 Timothy 2:21)

Confess your sins to one another. (James 5:16)

TO WHOM DO YOU CONFESS?

Sometimes, I want to tell my wife or a friend something. But I stop myself because I don’t want to get a rebuke, a lecture, or a “how could you be so foolish?” Or, perhaps even worse: Advice. Or just as lovely, a horror story of how he or she has experienced what I’m talking about. And then there’s the fear of my confidence being betrayed.

Over time, with my brothers in my Life Transformation Group, we have developed trust and confidence. When I confess what’s weighing heavy on my conscience, I will receive nothing but the freedom and forgiveness that Jesus gives by His death and resurrection. I’m blessed to have such brothers in Christ. They are a gift from God and an answer to prayer.

Pray that God give you such friends. (Or give thanks for having them.)

(You’ll notice that I said “brothers.” That’s because I believe you should only confess to people of the same sex. If you need the reason, just ask.)

WHAT DO YOU CONFESS?

I greatly indebted to the guy who developed the LTG concept. One criticism, though, was his list of things to confess. The list included financial stewardship, sexual purity, honesty, gossip, and a few other things. All good, Biblical stuff. But by the end, I felt like I had been hit over the head with a baseball bat; and I didn’t care if I sinned anymore.

I want to grow in my walk with Christ. But I realized that I could focus on one, maybe two, things each week. The point is not to confess each and every sin and failing during the week.

The point of confession is two-fold. First, to overcome sins that destroy yourself or others. Second, to grow in Christ-like character.

I’m still wondering what a few women meant when they expressed fear of revealing sin to another human. I am certainly aware of the incredibly embarrassing sin of men. (Not from experience, in case my wife is reading this. Are there other women, Sweetie? I hadn’t noticed or thought about it.) I’ve gotten the impression that people expect this question to result in the revelation of the most disgusting, vile, “juicy” sins. And it may. We’ll discuss that in a later blog.

But for me, I’ve tried to fully conquer a particular sin, let’s say greed. In doing so, I became obsessed with it, and began to hate life. Now, I’m content to isolate the damage of those “negative” kind of sins.

But certainly, if I’m engaging in sins that destroy myself or others, it must be conquered. Sins like gossip, addictions, abuse, and whatnot, must be confessed, forgiven, and conquered by Christ’s power (and by any other resources at your disposal; that’s part of the first use of the law for you theologians).

But, honestly, the sins I’m most embarrassed about are not the “juicy” ones. They are character failings, like a weak prayer life, like not loving, like lacking the joy of the Lord. And it is those character growth areas that I usually confess.

I really hope this helps you see the value of confession and forgiveness. You will see it as growing in Christ-like character. It is the power of cleaning out the old, dumping it out to another human (who is Christ’s representative), and receiving Christ’s powerful life through another human (who is Christ’s representative).

I want to encourage you to re-read these three blogs on confession, to pray about it, and to pray for a partner in growing in Christ-like character.

Let me know how this is playing out in your life. It truly helps me. And I like to hear what is and is not working for others.

In Christ,
Pastor Steve

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